((Any similarity of any person you know or know of to HRCP Malaria is purely coincidental)


Princess Malaria is terribly vain.
She primps and she pampers, avoids looking plain.

She talks to her mirror, and says loud and clear,
Her eyes start to clinch and her lips show a sneer....

"Now mirror of mine, sitting up on the wall,
You know I am fairest, the fairest of all.

She's really obsessed with herself-- and it's true,
She cares not a wit, about me, them or you.

She saunters around, and she's found everywhere,
Just walk around Dzitzel--catch Malaria there.

She expects that her subjects will grunt "ah " with awe,
And certainly think that of folks seen or saw---

She 's a sight to behold very lovely and rare.
No person in Dzitzel comes close to compare.

Be pleased that your taxes will be in the till,
To buy for the princess, what gladdens her will.


In the sense that Queen Heartbeat of Dzitzel is self-obsessed, her only child/daughter, HRH Crown Princess Malaria is a chip off the old chopping block.

Princess Malaria cares only about herself. The world is her oyster and there's a pearl in it. (I'll give you two guesses who that pearl might be, but you only need one!)

Princess Malaria is vain and self-indulgent. In addition, she insists on being catered to by everyone. Her mother, Queen Heartbeat agrees with this concept and wants it DONE!

Nothing is ever enough for Princess Malaria. Even what is enough for her is never enough, EVER! She has 1,072 closets which are stuffed with her belongings. The royal carpenters are building even more closets for her right this minute.

Princess Malaria loves to look at herself in the mirror. She repeatedly says, "why, I do declare, if I am not the most beautiful, exquisite, comely, attractive, handsome, captivating, enthralling, enticing, ravishing, bewitching, magnificent, lustrous, dazzling, radiant, princess in the Queen's whole Queendom, then I will eat all of my belongings.


(Oh, by the way, just in case you haven't caught on by now, Her Royal Highness Crown Princess Malaria is the ONLY princess in Queen Heartbeat's whole Queedom!)


The standards of pretty, you already know,
From Malaria's presence, the head to the toe.

Queen Heartbeat declares in a voice loud and clear,
Her eyes also clinching, her lips in a sneer,

"Wherever you go and whatever you do,
Make way, 'cause my daughter is soon coming through."

"Malaria's the utmost, the thing you will catch,
All your eyes are forbidden to see any match."

"I'll give you a warning, take heed if you please,
Respect my Malria's melodious sneeze."

"Regard the fine elegant glide of her walk,
Pay tribute, have reverence, the sound of her talk."

"And mostly bow down to her beautiful face,
Her body adorned with silk, satin and lace."

"Make sure that the shoes on her feet you adore,
Or your nose will be chopped and will fall to the floor."


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